Implantable Chip Designed To Kill Dissidents, Hired-Help

Saudi files killer tracking chip patent

German Patent and Trademark Office (DPMA) spokeswoman Stephanie Krüger revealed Friday that the DPMA received an application from a Saudi Arabian citizen for a patent on his new invention.

The invention? Two versions of a subcutaneous chip to be implanted in humans: The first of which, according to the Jeddah-based inventor, is solely for “…the purposes of determining its geographical location.”

The inventor claims the device would use GPS tracking technology and would radio its location—and, therefore, the implantee’s—to a remote tracking center.

Now, I can think of really good uses for such a gadget, such as tracking politicians who are wont to take bribes in the form of free vacations at lavish resorts.

But then there’s the “B” model, which would—in the inventor’s words:

“…be suited for tracking fugitives from justice, terrorists, illegal immigrants, criminals, political opponents, defectors, domestic help, and Saudi Arabians who don’t return home from pilgrimages.

“In recent times the number of people sought by security forces has increased…I apply for these reasons and for reasons of state security and the security of citizens.”

In the “B” version, a controller need but press a button, sending a signal to the implant which then releases a lethal dose of cyanide into the bloodstream of the implantee.

Note that among the potential targets of this ghastly Orwellian device is listed “domestic help.” You return from a hard day’s work sentencing rape victims to torture and prison, to find that the maid hasn’t dusted your favorite beheading sword. Well, a simple touch of a button and her dinner plans are Kaput!

And if you don’t return to Saudi Arabia from your pilgrimage to, say, Las Vegas, a brief radio signal will fix your defecting tuchas.

Need I comment on the immoral, Hitlerian mindset of this—obviously well-educated and intelligent—Saudi? Likely not, but I will anyway.

Apparently, it doesn’t even occur to this lunatic that the Germans might not want to track and kill immigrants and butlers.

One wonders how typical this insane mentality may be among the rest of Saudi intelligentsia. Or the dimwits, for that matter. From all reports it seems to be the norm, rather than the exception.

But I digress…

DPMA spokeswoman Krüger added:

“Foreigners are allowed to apply for patents in Germany through a native representative, in this case it was a Munich law firm…Most people apply for a patent in several countries, and this inventor probably did too.

“While the application is still pending further paperwork on [the inventor’s] part, the invention will probably be found to violate paragraph two of the German Patent Law—which does not allow inventions that transgress public order or good morals.”

The law firm, DTS Munich, which represented the evil sonuvabitch inventor, "…resigned from representation of this case last week," a spokesman said without stating why.

Why? Well, gee, could it be… I dunno… that they finally read the patent application?

Note: If you would like to read about life in Saudi Arabia from the perspective of someone neither evil or insane and possessed of an excellent command of English, I suggest the Saudi Jeans Blog.